The Next Reality Show

Well friends I just HAD to share this with you. I opened my inbox today and found this hilarious message sent to me from Michaela (familyroom girl extraordinare). This is definitely one to share. I have no idea where it comes from so am unable to give credit where credit is due. So, whoever put this together, if you stumble upon it here…we thank you for making us smile/laugh once again at the craziness of our lives as mum’s!

Enjoy.

Susan

THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES 

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 
3 kids each for six weeks. 

Each kid will play 
Two sports 
And either take music 
Or dance classes. 

There is no fast food. 

Each man must
Take care of his 3 kids; 
Keep his assigned house clean, 
Correct all homework, 
And complete science projects, 
Cook, do laundry, 
And pay a list of ‘pretend’ bills 
With not enough money. 

In addition, each man 
Will have to budget in money 
For groceries each week. 

Each man 
Must remember the birthdays 
Of all their friends and relatives, 
And send cards out 
On time–no Emailing. 

Each man must also 
Take each child to a doctor’s appointment, 
A dentist appointment 
And a haircut appointment. 

He must make 
One unscheduled and inconvenient 
Visit per child 
To the A & E. 

He must also 
Make biscuits or cakes 
For a social function. 

Each man will be responsible for 
Decorating his own assigned house, 
Planting flowers outside 
And keeping it presentable 
At all times. 

The men will only 
Have access to television 
When the kids are asleep 
And all chores are done. 

The men must 
Shave their legs, 
Wear makeup daily, 
Adorn himself with jewellery, 
Wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, 
Keep fingernails polished 
And eyebrows groomed. 

During one of the six weeks, 
The men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, 
And have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or 
Slow down from other duties. 

They must attend 
Weeklyschool meetings, 
Church, and find time 
At least once to spend the afternoon 
At the park or a similar setting. 

They will need to 
Read a book to the kids 
Each night and in the morning, 
Feed them, dress them, 
Brush their teeth and 
Comb their hair by 8:00 am. 

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: 
Each child’s birthday, 
Height, weight,
Shoe size, clothes size 
And doctor’s name. 
Also the child’s weight at birth, 
Length, time of birth, 
And length of labour, 
Each child’s favourite colour, 
Middle name, 
Favourite snack, 
Favourite song, 
Favourite drink, 
Favourite toy, 
Biggest fear and 
What they want to be when they grow up. 

The kids vote them off the island 
Based on performance. 
The last man wins only if…
He still has enough energy 
To be intimate with his spouse 
At a moment’s notice. 

If the last man does win, 
He can play the game over and over 
And over again for the next 18-25 years 
Eventually earning the right 
To be called Mum! 

After you get done laughing,
Send this to as many females as you 
Think will get a laugh out of it and 
As many men as you think can 
Handle it! 
Just don’t send it back to me…. I’m going to bed.