building families, developing relationships, strengthening communities

The other day I saw a swag of birds gathered on overhead electric wires. It was an Aha! Moment! (thanks Oprah!) To me those twenty-something birds all perched along the wires, were a snapshot of togetherness, community! Birds of a feather flock together and it is just as true with humans. 

Community has always resonated with me – it’s expression across the world, the way it is embraced through cultures throughout history. Community is small and intimate, yet gigantic and all-compassing. 

I can still hear the words of my social science teacher in high school “family and community are the nucleus of society”.

When a large piece of fabric begins to fray at the edges, you see the many thin individual threads that make up that one large piece of material – so it is with community – a large tapestry of individuals, families, joined together and belonging as one whole. It is a powerful thing to go from “me” to “we”.
 
One of the greatest gifts my parents have given me is an awareness of community, even at a global level. In the 70’s they were young pioneer missionaries from Australia to the remote pockets in the Eastern Highlands of Papua New Guinea. My Mom worked as a nurse and teacher on the mission, while my Dad built houses and churches. I was born in Goroka and spent my early years growing up in primitive surroundings. My world was a unique fusion of Western missionary folk and the majority were Native village dwellers who had the whitest teeth and brightest eyes when they smiled.

The cultures we encountered were raw, jungle book stories! We shared the same love for baked sweet potato cooked in the ground under flames, rocks and banana tree leaves. But that village became our home, and the natives our family. We all shared the same mountainside, the same soil, the same rain water, we all laughed the same, we walked the same dusty roads into town to buy and sell at the markets. We were diverse, yet we were community.

Community is not sharing the same skin colour. Although it can be that, it is far more. Community is a many a splendid thing. The smallest day to day connections and encounters between humankind. It is organic, and stems from grass-root commonalities; it is valuing yourself and others; understanding life in someone else’s shoes; a commitment to forge togetherness and acceptance; sharing the load of our basic needs for water, food, shelter, safety, language, acceptance and belonging; beliefs for the common good of others. People don’t have to look the same to exist and build community. Community is one heart connected to many hearts.

For a time, I lived and worked in Japan. The day I arrived in Tokyo, I was jolted by the population, the surge of people everywhere. In my first letter I wrote home to my family, I said “it feels like I am at the Sydney Olympics everyday, throngs of people on the trains, crossing city streets. I have never seen this many people, en masse, it is insane”. Yet over the weeks and months I discovered, buried in the rush and over-crowded city, pockets of community…groups of people who connected to bring their worlds into some meaningful intimacy and togetherness. It is impossible to be friends with 20 million people, but to connect with 200 people, over time, is very possible and rather wonderful as our lives strengthen and deepen when our personal story merges into a larger story.

We do ourselves a disservice if we live unto ourselves in an attempt to resist the tug and demands of community. Let your arms open to a greater sense of community…the world will hug you back! If you are reading this article on a website, then it is a given that you are already open to the internet community and the incredible connection it brings to our lives.

Let’s get in the mix! Introduce yourself to your neighbor next door. Say G’day to the person waiting in the line at the grocery store. Smile and look into people’s eyes when you talk to them. Appreciate the differences you see in others. Join in the chorus and sing the national anthem with gusto with your fellow countrymen. Wear the colours to support your local football club. Say a prayer for the unknown victims who suffer from war and strife in other not-so-lucky countries. Adopt a sponsor child from an undeveloped nation. We can’t do everything, but we must do something. 

The sense of camaraderie is one of the most spectacular by-products of community, and the beauty of it is, it can be felt with our family, friends and even with perfect strangers. I like to think that strangers are just friends I haven’t met yet! Howard Thurman wrote these knowing words… “Community cannot for long feed on itself; it can only flourish with the coming of others from beyond, their unknown and undiscovered brothers.“

The greatest word I know that encapsulates the essence of community is the Greek word “agape” -which refers to the human manifestation of God’s pure love, or the intentional and unconditional love for others – including your enemies.

Rochelle.

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